To A Girl I Know

I don’t know when it all started to cave in for you or when God stopped making sense. I know you read your bible and loved church but sometimes all that becomes irrelevant. Things happen and there is that pivital moment, that influence that tugs on the soul like none other has before and you wonder if you ever knew the truth or had the answers. The voices tell you you didn’t or can’t…that you need to find your own new path to a more enlightened understanding. Be bold, be independent, defy authority, be who you “really want to be”… be “yourself.” Unprepared for this influx of thought yet seeking it all at the same time, you embrace a whole new existence and quickly abandon all that you once knew, half knew or really never knew at all. The boundaries blur; there is so much ground to cover and so little time. The encrusted soul doesn’t feel a thing but it will. You get what you give and you’ll get a return on the interest you invest in this ambiguous period of no defined conclusion time. I guess you still haven’t found what you’re looking for but doubting and questioning does not mean abandonment is the only way. If I could sit and make sense of it with you, I would as someone who has a lot to learn and a lot to read. It is the more difficult way but I’ve learned the hard way that doubt without study is merely the easy way out. Maybe that’s not the real issue though. Perhaps leaving your faith in last year is merely a means to do what you want to do with a clearer conscience. Perhaps I’m just rambling so I’ll leave my thoughts here for now.

About Susanna

A follower of Jesus, married to Rick for 18 years, mother to 3 boys and 3 girls, a writer all my life. A believer that, above all else, I am beautifully loved and mercifully redeemed by a savior who came to rescue mess-ups like me.
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3 Responses to To A Girl I Know

  1. Rick says:

    Amen, gorgeous writing

  2. Grace says:

    Wow…I wish one of my good friends could read this

  3. bchallies says:

    Some good thoughts, Susanna. I especially like “…doubt without study is the easy way out.” and, that leaving faith in last year is a way of blunting your conscience in order to sin…

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